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Wlaf1450By Michael Yates
OAK RIDGE, TN. (WLAF)- In The Secrets of Happy Families, author Bruce Feiler noted that “no parent in the world would say they don’t want happy kids.” True. Ruth and I certainly wanted that for our two children, and we still do. But somewhere along the way, most parents discover that happiness isn’t a destination. It’s a welcome stop along life’s journey.
Feiler also emphasized: “The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative.”
When we become clear-eyed about what we really want for our children, the wish for happiness gives way to something deeper and longer lasting: that they develop a positive self-regard and self-confidence, believe they are capable of doing hard things, understand responsibility, and—perhaps most importantly—know they are loved.
I recently experienced this hope through, of all things, a text exchange with our daughter.
She was going through a series of difficult interviews and background checks related to a job opportunity she was seeking. The process was rigorous, lengthy, and thorough. At one point, her mother and I marveled at her commitment to the process as other candidates fell by the wayside and were not moving forward.
Her response was simple and succinct: “Built different,” she wrote.
And there it was. Two words that somehow said so much: confidence, conviction, resilience and self-belief.
There are no guarantees that life’s difficulties and complexities won’t challenge those words, or that she won’t have moments when she doubts them.
For children growing up in hard places, carrying significant trauma histories, or lacking consistent support, developing that kind of narrative can be extraordinarily difficult. This is where families, neighbors, teachers, coaches, mentors, and other caring adults matter. We can help children discover their own version of “built different”—not as invulnerability, but as a belief that they have strengths, worth, and the capacity to face hard things.
Family narratives are an amalgam of individual stories woven together into a shared story about who we are, where we come from, what we value, and how we face adversity.
So what is your story? And what is the story your family tells about you? Perhaps it is a story of perseverance, compassion, faith, courage, humor, service—or simply getting back up when life knocks you down.
It is never too late to add your voice to the family narrative. After all, you, too, are built differently.
For those who find anxiety, isolation, or fear becoming overwhelming, it is important to remember that help is available. Local organizations like Ridgeview stand ready to help individuals and families find a path forward with tools and support for navigating difficult emotions.
If you or someone you know is in need of professional support, Ridgeview is here to help. Care can begin today through Ridgeview’s Walk-in Clinic locations in Anderson, Campbell, Fentress, Morgan, Scott, and Roane counties. Visit www.ridgeview.com to learn more.
For anyone experiencing a mental health crisis, Ridgeview’s Mobile Crisis Line is available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year at 1-800-870-5481.
is the Director of Development at Ridgeview Behavioral Health Services
Ridgeview is a private, not for profit community mental health center serving Anderson, Campbell, Fentress, Morgan, Roane, Scott, and Union counties. (WLAF NEWS PUBLISHED 8/25/2026-6AM-PAID)